It’s fine to chat with me, but I’m not responsible if feelings develop

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This post was last edited by cflt111 on 2018-6-19 07:58. 1. If any of you dare to disturb me while I’m doing my homework, I’ll play with you. 2. I’ll always like you, as long as you stay handsome. 3. I hope you live a happy life from now on. If I’m not happy, I’m afraid I’ll laugh out loud in my dreams. 4. I heard that keeping a phone next to the pillow while sleeping can emit radiation, which scared me so much that I quickly got up and threw away the pillow. 5. A female teacher drew an apple on the blackboard and asked the students, “What is this?” ”As a result, everyone replied: “Buttocks!” ”The female teacher went to the principal crying, and the principal was very angry; he came to the classroom and said, “How could you make the teacher cry like that?” ”He took another look at the blackboard: “Wow, you guys even drew a butt on it!” ” 6. I heard that if you’re not good-looking, you should read more books; no wonder my mom said since I was young that I wasn’t cut out for studying. 7. When Xiaoming came home from the exam, his mother asked him, “How did you do on the exam?” ”Xiao Ming said, “I got only one question wrong!” ! ”Mom asked, “What question?” ”Xiaoming said, “Ask what 3 multiplied by 7 equals?” ”Mom asked, “What is your answer?” Xiaoming said, “I just filled in 28 without thinking too much about it.” 8. A: “The weather is nice today!” ”B: “It’s good.” ”A: “Look, does that cloud resemble the two hundred yuan I lent you last month?” ” Funny jokes that are hilarious – 9. After getting my hair cut, the barber asked me how I liked it; I remained silent for a moment before saying to him ； “I'm just glad you're happy. ” 10. I can’t catch up to you probably because I have short legs. 11. One day, the little bear went to get his nails trimmed, and then he turned into a little superhero… 12. The doctor came out of the delivery room, and the man approached anxiously, asking, “How is it?” ”Doctor: “The adult was saved, but alas, the child…” Hearing the news, the man began to sob. Doctor: “It’s April Fools’ Day today; I was just joking, hahaha~” The man’s face immediately lit up with joy, and the doctor added, “Your wife is dead too.” ” 13. There is a sissy in the class. One day, I got into a argument with another classmate, who insulted him by saying, “Hey, you wimp!” ”He said, “Hello, son.” ”The whole class fell silent; 3 seconds later, thunderous applause erupted, lasting for a long time. 14. Before the exam, the children who studied well would say, “I’m going to take the exam!” ”Those who don’t do well in studying say, “Damn it!” There’s an exam! ”After the exam, the children who did well said, “I’ve finished the exam!” ”Those who don’t do well in studying say, “Damn it!” It’s over! ” 15. I can chat with you, but I’m not responsible if feelings develop. 16. One day, I felt stomach pain, so I rushed to the bathroom. After taking off my pants, I tried hard for a while, and then with a loud noise, I let out a giant fart. Then I heard the guy from the next pit say, “Damn…” When I was about to leave, that guy asked again, “Bro, do you have any more paper?” I got scared by you just now, and the paper fell into the hole! ” 17. I was walking on the road just now when I received a strange call from a woman; she started by saying, “Hello!” Congratulations! You have won the second prize of our company, worth 300,000! ”I hadn’t said anything yet, when she burst into laughter and said, “Sorry, it’s my first time lying; I just couldn’t hold back…” Then she hung up, leaving me standing there in confusion in the wind… It’s so funny, really hilarious. 18. Sharing my experience with online shopping: Just leave a message for the seller saying “I’m a Virgo,” and you’ll find that the items sent to you are of the highest quality! 19. I didn’t jump the farthest in the long jump today, but I made the deepest hole – I’m proud. . . 20. When a friend got married, his wife brought a small bottle and said that from now on, every time he made her cry, he should drop a drop of water into the bottle. Once the bottle was full, her heart would surely die, and she would leave him without hesitation. 3 years have passed; a few days ago he secretly poured two large spoons of water into that bottle, and his wife caught him and beat him. 21. “When you were young, what kind of scenario did you imagine for yourself when you grew up that would allow you to stand out in front of everyone?” ”“Carry a load of manure to the street, and whenever you see someone you don’t like, pour a bucket of it on them! ” 22. Someone said I was ugly; I felt so sorry for him – he went blind at such a young age! When I got home, I asked the fan if I was ugly The fan kept spinning its blades all morning, and I immediately felt much more comfortable! The idiot boyfriend next to her said, \"Don’t listen to the fan; it’s all just nonsense.\"