19 mistakes you shouldn’t make at the office

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　　1. Don’t dress better than your boss. 　　If you happen to encounter a boss with extremely poor taste, who likes to wear cheap suits and show off to others that they are brand-name, then I suggest you buy some fabric and have a local tailor make you a suit. I advise you not to try to influence your boss’s taste by using your own example as a reference; you should understand that the reason this guy, who seems like a country bumpkin, is your boss is certainly not because of his sense of style. Maybe he hates men who act like playboys. 　　 　　2. Do not try to flirt with the boss’s female secretary. 　　Acting recklessly right under your boss’s nose is nothing short of seeking your own destruction. Even if the relationship between your boss and his secretary is as transparent and flawless as bottled purified water in an office, you shouldn’t overlook a normal man’s desire to possess what he finds attractive, as well as his jealousy and hostility toward those of the same gender. It’s just like when you see a stunning woman being hugged by some ugly guy on the street – you’d think to yourself, \"Hmph, what a lucky bastard!\" 　　 　　3. Don’t show off your extraordinary oratory skills everywhere in the office. 　　Perhaps you want to present yourself to your boss as a great orator, but unfortunately, almost all bosses hate to see a talkative man who is as chatterbox as a hen that has just laid eggs. Remember, if you can convey something in three minutes, never spend three hours doing it. If you’re the type of person who goes crazy if you don’t talk, then I suggest you talk loudly at the wall at home for an hour until you’re exhausted, until you no longer feel like talking nonsense at the office, and then go to work. Being sparing with words is one of the most fundamental professional qualities you should uphold; express your views in the shortest possible sentences in a highly professional manner. Also, don’t interrupt others, especially your boss, while they are speaking. 　　 　　4. Don’t date your colleagues. 　　Because you’re just an ordinary man, it’s difficult for you to ignore your partner, and the direct consequence of this is that even if you work hard like a hardworking ox, your boss will still suspect that you spend all your working hours dating. Don’t complain about the boss’s unfounded suspicions; if you were in his shoes, you would think the same way. If you truly fall in love with a colleague of yours, it seems there are only two options: either you leave the company, or your partner leaves the company. 　　 　　5. Don’t tell yellow jokes. 　　You need to understand that this hobby has nothing to do with humor. Although you manage to make her laugh with your feminine jokes, it’s very likely that she’ll turn to herself and say: Good heavens! This guy is really shameless! To even say such things! 　　 　　6. Don’t be friends with your colleagues. 　　Although it’s a bit extreme to consider your colleagues as your hypothetical enemies, it can at least help you avoid certain nasty office conflicts; just think of them as a group of strangers whose names you know. Never, ever share your private matters with colleagues in confidence; it’s like having a landmine beside you that remains silent for now, but if it explodes one day, you’re completely doomed. A colleague can be far more harmful than a close friend; at the very least, a close friend doesn’t know who your boss is. 　 　　 　　7. Do not flatter your boss in an obvious way. 　　If he weren’t a **, he would understand that you’re just teasing him. 　 　　8. Do not talk about your boss behind their back. 　　If you’re really feeling frustrated, why not find a sandbag, write the boss’s name on it, and give that guy a good beating? At least, it’s not as risky as telling your colleagues bad things about your boss. Generally speaking, the things you say about your boss behind his back will soon reach his ears, and they often turn out to be dozens of times worse than what you actually said. You need to be careful; who knows, your boss might beat you up at some point — it might not be that bad, or maybe he’ll just fire you. 　　 　　9. Don’t go to the office dressed like a punk. 　　Even if your work environment doesn’t require you to wear a formal suit and tie, opt for the simplest casual attire. Apart from your wedding ring, don’t wear any other jewelry, as this might make you appear more feminine than your female colleagues. Try to avoid wearing pink-colored clothes; if you don’t want to spend time choosing outfits, opt for dark colors instead. It is important to note that you must never wear white socks with black leather shoes. Clean out your closet from time to time and throw away those socks with holes. 　　 　　10. Do not log in to **websites** on the office computer. 　　If you think that no one is paying attention to what you’re doing, or if you believe yourself to be a computer expert who can delete the websites you’ve visited without leaving any traces, then you’re clearly overestimating your skills. Your boss can very easily and quickly find out what you’re doing on your computer, if he wants to. This is especially easy in large companies with well-equipped facilities. So if you don’t want to leave any leverage in your boss’s hands, then hold on for now and wait until you get home to watch it, if your wife supports you doing that. 　　 　 　　11. Don’t forget to turn off your phone and pager at the office. 　　Why not allow others to call the office? The sound from your phone will only annoy your colleagues around you, especially when your boss is talking to you or during important meetings. Don’t be deceived by phone ads that make you think successful people keep their phones on 24/7. They just want to sell a few more machines. 　　　　 　　12. Don’t make your desk messier than the trash can. 　　Even if you like that sour, fermented smell of food, it’s better to keep it at home. Clean your desk before others walk by it with frowns; after all, this isn’t your private bedroom, and you need to consider the eyes and noses of your other colleagues. 　 　 　　13. Do not give expensive gifts to your boss or colleagues. 　　This will only embarrass him and lead to wild guesses among his colleagues. 　　 　　14. Don’t get involved in the power struggles within large companies. 　　Especially when you are just an ordinary employee with no high-level connections, never have the naive idea of trying to form an alliance with a department head. Corporate matters and secrets are always more complex and intricate than you can imagine, and you may not even realize it until you become a victim of some conflict. It’s the same for companies from any company or country; why not just do one’s own job properly? Let them fight; just treat it like watching a circus show! 　　　　 　　15. Do not make or receive phone calls in the office for more than ten minutes. 　　When you encounter something embarrassing, like flirtatious calls. Do not try to avoid others’ attention by lowering your voice or changing the tone of your speech; this will only make your colleagues more suspicious and curious. 　　 　　16. Do not marry your boss’s daughter. 　　Relying on marriage to achieve career success is a short-sighted approach; even if you put in great effort and are indeed a capable person, others will think it’s simply because you married the boss’s daughter. If your boss doesn’t have a fairy-like daughter, then why go to all this trouble? A good man, no matter whose daughter he marries, will succeed sooner or later. 　　 　　17. Don’t marry your boss if she is a woman. 　　You will find that from now on, not only in the office. Even the home has become a place full of disasters. Imagine, when you’re making love to this woman in bed and suddenly remember that she’s your boss – wouldn’t you feel a surge of guilt? If so, let me remind you: never try to pursue your female boss, unless you like it when people give you orders at home or if you have a tendency toward being abused. 　　18. Don’t arrive at work on time every day. 　　Occasionally retreat intentionally once. It is a form of psychological comfort for other colleagues who are *slow and procrastinatory. Who knows, you might even gain good popularity because of it. 　　 　　19. Don’t trust the boss’s promises easily. 　　Perhaps you are a kind and honest person who believes every word the boss says to you. You might believe that your boss didn’t give you a raise this year because he’s in a desperate predicament and needs to use your meager salary to get through those difficulties, or you might think there are hints in his words suggesting that he plans to promote you, but you need to be prepared for the possibility that you won’t get anything at all. Ignore what the boss says he wants to give you; first look at what he has already given you, compare it, and then decide whether it’s still necessary to work for such a boss