Never put the light bulb in your mouth

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In the UK, the packaging of light bulbs contains a warning – do not put that object into your mouth. In other words, do not put the light bulb in your mouth. 　 　　He NND... would anyone actually import such a thing? British people are all a bit idiots... Let me tell you, nothing in life is absolute! One day I was watching TV at home with an Indian friend, and I talked to him about this. He told me that their elementary school textbooks also mentioned it – that once the light bulb is inserted, it gets stuck and can’t be taken out no matter what; he was absolutely sure that’s what the books said... But I’m very skeptical. I think the surface of the light bulb is quite smooth, and if it can be inserted, it means the opening is big enough for it to go in and out, so in theory it should be possible to take it out. But that Indian idiot just said that’s what the book says… so it must be true. His attitude of not wanting to understand anything angered me; I called him stupid, and he said he didn’t know English and didn’t read books… so we started arguing. I went home in a fury, picked up an ordinary-sized light bulb, and kept thinking about it on the bed; I still believed I was right. Thinking about the ignorance of that Indian friend, I acted in the spirit of a scientist—making bold hypotheses and then carefully verifying them. I decided to prove that he was looking. Of course, I also took safety measures... I bought a bottle of vegetable oil and brought it home. If it gets stuck, just release some oil – I don’t believe it won’t slide out! Everything was ready, so without hesitation I put the light bulb in my mouth... It slid in in less than a second; it was quite easy... Given this, there should be no problem taking it out. 　　I thought to myself, “You idiot Indian! See the wisdom and courage of us Chinese! Not like you, a bookworm…” I imagined China defeating India… and I laughed out loud… haha! Then I gently pulled on the light bulb...................... Okay, I’ll use more force..................... O.K., I’ll open my mouth wider......................... No problem; I’ll open my mouth as wide as possible and use more force (but I have to be careful not to tear the bulb)........................ Damn!.......................... It’s really stuck inside......................... Luckily, there’s still some vegetable oil available......................... (After 30 minutes), I poured in 3/4 of a bottle of oil, half of which went into the bulb, but it still didn’t move at all........................ At that point, I had no choice but to call for help...................... Just as I was about to press the button, I remembered that there was a light bulb stuck in my mouth................... How am I supposed to speak? 　　Now I have no choice but to ask my neighbor for help; I wrote a note and then went to see the old woman next door. As soon as she saw me, she started screaming for help.................... I immediately showed her my note: \"Please call me a taxi and tell the driver to take me to the hospital.\" (Please get me a taxi, and also tell the driver to take me to the hospital.) ) She watched it for about 1.75 seconds before bursting into loud laughter..........................(If I could speak, I’d f**k her. ) 15 minutes later, the taxi arrived. When the driver saw me, he smiled once (in fact, he hadn’t stopped at all). 　　He kept asking me in the taxi why I did such a thing... (...Damn it... how was I supposed to answer him?) ) He kept saying my mouth was too small; if it were his mouth, there would be no problem... I saw that his mouth was indeed very big... But I really wanted to tell him not to try it under any circumstances... Unfortunately, I couldn’t bring myself to speak! When I looked at his rearview mirror, it felt like I had a goldfish in my mouth... At the hospital, the nurses scolded me for over ten minutes, saying I was wasting their time. I had to wait in a long line... I stayed in that crowd for 2.5 hours... 2.5 hours... Those patients in extreme pain seemed to feel no pain when they saw me... Everyone secretly smiled. I felt like I was still useful after all... The doctor put cotton balls on either side of my mouth, then broke a light bulb and took out the pieces one by one. My mouth swelled up greatly... In the end, he told me not to try it again and to share my experience with others... I told him I definitely wouldn’t do it again. 　　When I left the hospital, I thought there must be no one on this earth as stupid as me... When I opened the door to leave, a person came towards me – it was the taxi driver from earlier.......................... ........................... ........................... ........................... ........................... ........................... He had a light bulb in his mouth. There’s more to this story: I tried it just now, and indeed I couldn’t get it out; it was a waste of a light bulb… and also of a ** – what complete sacrifice! Ugh… I’m typing these words in the dark; you can’t imagine how I broke the light bulb. Once it was inside, it was impossible to break it from the side. I tried inserting a screwdriver, but there wasn’t enough room to apply enough force to break it. Eventually, I held the light bulb in my mouth and used its base to hit the sink in the kitchen until it broke. Luckily, my mouth wasn’t completely damaged, but it was still scratched. Damn it… It’s only now that I realize there are important blood vessels in the mouth; I should have known not to try this. Thankfully, the damage was only minor – my hand was slightly cut by the small glass shards on the base of the light bulb. It wasn’t serious. When the light bulb exploded, the noise was so loud it made me dizzy; my eyes almost popped out. An interesting conclusion: The **s sold in street vending machines are very thick, making them safe for holding light bulbs. If I had used two, I wouldn’t have hurt my mouth. Another issue is that the taste is extremely unpleasant; when a person opens their mouth wide, the tongue pushes upward and the mouth cavity contracts inward. The bulb inserted there will expand the mouth and press on the tongue, preventing the mouth from being opened as wide as possible. So, it’s possible to insert the light bulb completely into the socket, but it’s impossible to take it out completely. You must have seen a seesaw; when you place something under one end of the seesaw, it can no longer be pushed down, and the other end can no longer be lifted. The upper palate of the human mouth is essentially a seesaw. When no light bulb is inserted, the mouth can be opened wide, just like a normal seesaw that can be raised high. Once a light bulb is inserted, space inside the mouth is occupied, which is equivalent to something being placed under the other end of the seesaw, leaving no space for it to drop. As a result, that other end, namely the mouth, cannot be opened as wide as before.