Zhou Xingchi’s classic lines for flirting with girls – quite funny

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I. At the bus stop: Zhou Xingxing: “Miss, you stepped on my foot.” Pretty girl: “No way, I’m so far away from you.” Zhou Xingxing: “I mean, if your foot accidentally ends up on mine, then you’ve stepped on it.” Pretty girl: “You’re crazy.” Zhou Xingxing: “Wow, you really have good eyesight; I do have a history of nervous disorders. It usually flares up when I see beautiful girls.” Pretty girl: “Guys are always like that, saying silly things just to provoke girls. They think they’re so handsome.” Zhou Xingxing: “You’re wrong, miss. I never think I’m handsome; I’m actually very handsome.” Pretty girl: “Stop being disgusting. I’m about to vomit.” Zhou Xingxing: “Can I ask you a question before you vomit?” Pretty girl: “Spit it out quickly.” Zhou Xingxing: “Why do you refuse to admit that I’m handsome, even though it goes against your conscience?” Pretty girl: “Get lost......” II. On the bus: Pretty girl: “How is it again, you?” “ Zhou Xingxing: “Sometimes I’m really everywhere.” Pretty girl: “Do you realize you’re annoying? There are so many other seats available, yet you insist on sitting next to me.” Zhou Xingxing: “Miss, understand this: I just sat in an empty seat, and it happened to be right next to you. That’s all.” Pretty girl: “There’s an empty seat ahead too – why don’t you sit there?” “ Zhou Xingxing: “Oh, I see. So you want to see my butt, or for me to use my butt to look at you?” “ Pretty girl: “Get lost...” 3. After getting off the bus, Pretty girl: “Why did you get off again?” “ Zhou Xingxing: “It’s not because of you anyway!” I like to stroll around.” Pretty girl: “I’m accusing you of sexual harassment. Which organization do you work for? “ Zhou Xingxing: “Do you mean jin, or joules, newtons?” “ Pretty girl: “Am I that familiar with you?” Always saying such nonsense. I’m sorry, I don’t have a cold! “ Zhou Xingxing: “Yes, we’re not familiar at all. We’re like two green strawberries on the same branch – sour.” Pretty Girl: “I’ve watched ‘A Chinese Odyssey’ a few times and learned a few lines from Tang Seng; do you think that makes you funny?” “ Zhou Xingxing: “Humor is innate; if you want to blame someone, blame my mom. Oh, and my dad too...” Pretty Girl: “Idiot.” Zhou Xingxing: “Your mom’s the idiot.” Pretty Girl: “Your mom’s the idiot.” Zhou Xingxing: “Look at you – it’s clearly your mom, but you insist it’s mine. Do you maybe want...?” Pretty Girl: “Get lost...” 4. Outside KFC Pretty Girl: “No way, how unlucky am I to run into you again?” Zhou Xingxing: “I noticed that too. I guess my sins in my past life must have been very serious.” Pretty Girl: “Speak more clearly!” Be careful or I’ll punch you! “ Zhou Xingxing: “Dare you? I’ll shout.” Pretty girl: “Shout what?” “ Zhou Xingxing: “That’s rude.” Pretty girl: “Do you really think someone will pay attention to you?” “ Zhou Xingxing: “It’s fine if there isn’t one; I’ll just go back by myself.” Pretty girl: “Good heavens, there are even scoundrels like you around—God’s eyes must be blind!” “ Zhou Xingxing: “Well, yes. Otherwise, there wouldn’t be any so-called elites in this world.” Pretty Girl: “........” 5. At KFC, Pretty Girl: “Stop talking; it annoys me when you talk.” Zhou Xingxing: “I haven’t said anything yet. Can we reason things out?” “ Pretty girl: “I’ve already told you to stop talking; the way you speak is like that of a fly – it’s disgusting.” Zhou Xingxing: “Oh, I had no idea that words could have such a big impact. It’s truly astonishing. Can I work part-time?” “ Pretty girl: “What to do?” “ Zhou Xingxing: “Go to the hospital and help someone with gastric lavage.” Pretty girl: “You’re beyond saving; go back and take care of the arrangements for your funeral.” Zhou Xingxing: “I have no requests before I die. I just want to say a few words to you, but I’m afraid you won’t agree. Will you agree?” “ Pretty girl: “Go ahead, I’ll consider reasonable requests.” Zhou Xingxing: “Could you treat me to a meal at KFC?” Pretty girl: “Die…” 6. Outside KFC, Pretty girl: “Don’t you have a girlfriend? Wandering around alone on Sundays?” Zhou Xingxing: “To be precise, I don’t have a girlfriend, but I do have female friends. Why do you ask?” Pretty girl: “It’s nothing, just caring about your important life decisions – isn’t that nice?” “ Zhou Xingxing: “Okay, why not?” You seem like someone I deeply love. “ Pretty girl: “Who?” ..Zhou Xingxing: “My mom… she also likes to keep asking all kinds of questions.” “ Pretty girl: “If it weren’t for all these people watching on the street, I really would hit you.” Zhou Xingxing: “I’m not afraid that others will see you hitting me; so what are you afraid of? And you, aren’t you supposed to be with your boyfriend?” “ Pretty girl: “Leave me alone!” “ Zhou Xingxing: “Oh, I see. You were dumped by your boyfriend, and you’re hitting me to find some psychological balance.” Pretty Girl: “You can’t expect something good from a bad person. Just say it outright – I don’t want to do this.” Zhou Xingxing: “Please consider me; I’m willing to suffer a little.” Pretty Girl: “Please stop annoying me.” Zhou Xingxing: “I can act as your temporary boyfriend without any conditions. If you need a boyfriend, just call ***********.” Pretty Girl: “We’ll talk about it later.” Zhou Xingxing: “At least tell me your phone number.” Pretty Girl: “We’ll talk about it later. If you keep bothering me, I’ll scold you.” Zhou Xingxing: “Okay, then send me a message to scold me.” Pretty Girl: .................. 7. They go home separately. Pretty Girl: “It’s strange… I really feel like sending him a message to scold him.” Zhou Xingxing: “Heh. It would be strange if she didn’t send a message to scold me.” Pretty Girl: “This is bad… Could it be that I really like that jerk?” Zhou Xingxing: “Hehe, it would be really bad if she didn’t like me, this jerk.”“