The English sentences that the Americans helped us revise
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My American colleague, in his free time, helps some online linguistics partners revise their articles. An expert can tell at a glance whether there are any issues; for some sentences, people think they’re written quite well. But after being revised by my American colleague, it becomes clear that Chinese speakers often overlook details when writing in English. Here are some simple suggestions that I hope will be useful to everyone:1) The Chinese version read: “At present now, I realized life is a long race. You can’t stop, or you will be caught up by others. I have to study a lot of subjects. My mom always said, ‘Why don’t you go to study? What if you can’t get into a good college?’ I have to study hard, but in my head I was more interested in math. My math teacher is not only very young and beautiful, but also very skilled. She is very kind to us. I like her very much. Because we both are Chinese, we are too shy to tell others about our true feelings. We also lost a lot of self-confidence.”
The American revision was: “At present, I realize life is a long race. You can’t stop, or else others will catch up to you. I have to study many subjects. My mom always asks, ‘Why don’t you study? What if you can’t get into a good college?’ I have to study hard, but deep down I’m more interested in math. My math teacher is not only very young and beautiful, but also very skilled. She’s very kind to us. I really like her. Since we’re both Chinese, we’re too shy to express our true feelings to others. We’ve also lost a lot of self-confidence.”
2) The Chinese version read: “Today is Chinese Valentine’s Day. I hope everyone can meet their love. I also hope the lovers will have a happy ending.”
The American revision was: “Today is Chinese Valentine’s Day. I hope everyone can find their love. I also hope that all lovers can live happily ever after.”
3) The Chinese version read: “It’s my first time writing a short passage here. And I haven’t been on this website for a long time. When I saw many people here working hard to improve their language skills, I thought I should do something to improve my English too.”
The American revision was: “This is my first time writing a short passage here. I haven’t been on this website for a long time. When I saw many people here striving to improve their language skills, I decided I should do something to improve my English as well.”
However, as for this sentence: I also hope the lovers will have (a) happy ending. I guess what the Chinese people want to express is: May all lovers in the world end up together. Americans are not familiar with this expression, so they change it to what they often say: I also hope all lovers can live happily ever after.
Three things to learn: First, “say” is not followed by “:””； II. It’s my first time; I wasn’t used to this before, and it’s true that this way is more natural ； III. On this website („in“ is not appropriate); this detail was also overlooked before. Thank Anita for sharing!
I don’t know which website these things are on? Could the poster recommend some websites for English communication? I also want to improve my English.
Reply to 4# Yafei: www.italki.com is a website created by a Chinese person, intended for language exchange. Due to the needs of a project at my company, I pressured my American colleagues to register on it, so that they could contribute in their free time – it’s not part of their regular duties. The registration is mainly aimed at promoting one of our projects. Anyway, there’s a lot of useful information on that site, and it’s possible to find friends for language exchanges as well. Anita registered yesterday as well, but she’s still figuring out how to use it. American colleagues seem to be more popular there; within just a few days, more than 50 people have added them as friends. Wishing you success. As a bonus, when Anita registered yesterday, she wrote a rather random self-introduction: “I am a Shanghainess. I was born here, live here, study here, work here, and I’ve never left this place. I really like American culture. I enjoy a relaxed lifestyle, and I like having fun with my friends. I also like my job; I always strive to do the right things and do everything properly.” The Americans immediately corrected it to: “I am a Shanghainese. I was born here, I studied here, I live here, and I work here; I’ve never left Shanghai. I really like American culture. I enjoy a relaxed lifestyle, and I like having fun with my friends. I also like my job; I always strive to do the right things and do everything properly.” Hey Anita, who thinks she’s so great, wake up!
This post was last edited by zidian1982 on 2010-8-18 at 15:56. Damn, I didn’t realize there was anything wrong when reading what you wrote; it seems I need to wake up too. You’ve never left Shanghai? That’s unbelievable.
This post was last edited by pH7 on 2010-8-18 at 14:31. Ha, I just registered as well and took a quick look around. It feels pretty good. Thank you, Anita:)
Reply to 7# pH7: By the way, what is your ID on Italki? Let’s be language buddies!
This post was last edited and replied to by pH7 on 2010-8-19 05:51. Reply 8# Saiqi Business: Finally, I found my ID and the address: http://www.italki.com/T006300210.htm. What about yours? I’m glad to be one of your language buddies.:)
but if you use the happy ending for all lovers.. you can make a joke of it as it has a double meaning ;) usually anyway (home run baby!)
Reply to 10# temujin: What is the double meaning? I have no idea. And what is “home run baby”?