With such matchmaking, brothers and sisters, please give some advice
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I am male. He’s almost 30 and still single! A friend introduced me to a girl; she isn’t from here, and we are very far apart (the flight costs over 1,800 yuan at full price). We haven’t met yet; from her photos, she doesn’t seem to be the type I like (Note: I’m not specifically looking for a beautiful woman; she just doesn’t match the appearance I envision for my girlfriend). Of course, she isn’t very pretty either. We chatted on QQ and talked on the phone; I got to know her a bit and thought we could understand each other well. But I just don’t feel anything for her – I have no urge to meet her. I just feel that I should adjust my expectations and standards; perhaps nothing in this world is perfect, which is why I keep delaying things! I don’t know if we should meet or not. If it’s close, meeting up isn’t a problem, but it’s far away – spending a month on travel costs an entire month’s salary, which is troubling (we’re both from poor families, so there’s nothing we can do). She said that if the two of us are compatible, she’ll quit her job and come here to get married; she’s the same age as me. Guys, let’s discuss it – should I spend this money or not? What will the future hold for the two of them? {:1_90:}
Reply to 1# wlc19820707: Watch a video first, then make a decision.
It’s still recommended to meet up, even if it’s just to resolve your own concerns. It is also a sign of taking responsibility for one another. Even if there’s no feeling after meeting, it’s fine to keep a distance. After all, since the relationship isn’t very deep, neither party will suffer much harm. There are similar examples around me; some people ended up doing well, while others separated after being together. It also depends on your fate together. (There are also brothers in the Haichuan Forum who had similar experiences; they are doing well now.) (I won’t mention his name out of concern for privacy.) The stress of living together after quitting jobs can be quite high; think it through carefully before making a decision. It’s hard to say. . .
Reply to 3# pzhmotor: Thanks, bro. The main reasons for my hesitation are: 1. I don’t feel anything for her (usually, when we like someone, we have nice fantasies about them, but I don’t have any such feelings toward her; I just think I should be realistic). 2. Just meeting up requires a lot of time and effort. 3. The future is even less certain. If I really liked someone or felt attracted to them, then I wouldn’t care about that money at all! This makes me think that love is not interesting at all
I don’t feel anything; it’s only a matter of time before something goes wrong. A marriage without love is hard to sustain – please be careful, OP
The OP is probably still unsatisfied with the other person’s appearance, which is why they can’t make up their mind.
Reply to #6: 365112263 probably makes up the majority, as I’ve never even seen it before; there’s no way to comment on its inner qualities. Right now, it’s simply a matter of whether it appeals to me visually
Men still prefer beautiful women, right? What’s meant by a good look is having an attractive appearance. Think of it as going on a trip; otherwise, you’ll regret it for the rest of your life if you miss out. . . . . . . . . . .
Reply to 1# wlc19820707: Sometimes people get married for the sake of marriage; it’s just a part of life’s journey. Whether there are feelings or not is one aspect, but what’s important is to have good character
Appearance is one aspect; in reality, what truly matters in a relationship between two people is whether their personalities complement each other. Love at first sight is love based on appearance, while love for a lifetime is love rooted in personality.