Sharing the cute quotes of the post-00s generation and the powerful post-80s mother, it made me laugh to death

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1. Duoduo was lying in bed in the morning, and her mother was lying on the warm quilt to persuade her that the child had to get up early to go to kindergarten. Duoduo said: Why can you stay in bed? Mom said: Because I didn’t stay in bed when I was in kindergarten, so when I grow up, I can lie in bed more! Duoduo said: What about dad? Mom said: When your father was little, he stayed in bed every day in kindergarten just like you, so now he has to get up early every day to take you to school! dad : @#￥%&……. 2. Duoduo said while eating: Mom, my stomach hurts! Mother: What to do? Duoduo: It would be fine if I didn’t eat! Mother: ……But the bugs in your stomach need to eat. If you don’t give them food, they will have no choice but to eat the meat in your stomach. Rouduo asked in horror.: Will my belly be broken? Mom thought about it and gave a serious answer.: Yes, all the intestines, urine and feces will flow out... Dad threw down his rice bowl - he was full 3. Duoduo wanted to watch Crayon Shin-chan, but mother said why you keep watching, you will go blind! Duoduo said: Mom, you are so beautiful! I love you mom! Mom said: Okay, let’s look at it for a while! 4. Mom is putting on makeup, Duoduo said, Mom, what are you doing? Mom said: Apply mascara and your eyes will look bigger.: Mom, I want to apply it too, Mom said: Your eyes are already very big, said Duoduo: But I want it to be big, big, big... Mom thought for a while and said: It would be very scary. The nose and mouth on the face would be squeezed out, leaving only two eyes. 5. Duoduo raised two little turtles and couldn't put them down, her mother said.: I like little turtles so much, let’s give them a name Duoduo: What should I call it? Mom said: Whatever you like, call it Duduo: Then call me mom and dad.: ……Let’s call Dad No. 1 and Dad No. 2, Dad—@#￥%…… 6. Duoduo said: Mom, I don’t want to go to kindergarten! Mother: Why Duoduo: Because I want to be with my mother, mother: What is 8+5? Duoduo hurriedly broke her fingers... There were not enough fingers for Duoduo.: Don't know mom: An uneducated child cannot be with his mother. This is * * Regulations... Duoduo... 7. On the way to kindergarten, Duoduo saw a woman begging with a child in her arms, Duoduo said: Mom, the money beggar is here, give it quickly, tell mom quickly: Why did Duoduo say: Because they are so pitiful, that child doesn’t even have money to buy anything to eat! Mom said: They begged because the child didn't go to kindergarten properly and spent all the money at home eating candies and watching Crayon Shin-chan every day, so his mother had to come out to beg... Duoduo: Dad, drive quickly... 8. Another time, an old professional beggar was begging in front of our car window. Mom took the opportunity to educate Duoduo.: Look, if you didn’t go to kindergarten well when you were a child, you won’t study well when you grow up. * , and finally had to go beg for food... On the way back, I saw someone kneeling on the overpass with their children asking for help. My mother continued to educate me.: If you don't go to school well, in the future... Duoduo: Will you go out to beg for food with your mother? Mother: ……..I guess you came out alone to ask for... 9. Duoduo has recently become obsessed with playing mini games and plays them for more than an hour.: Is Duoduo so fun? Duoduo?: It's fun, Mom: Too bad, will you be addicted to the Internet when you grow up... Duo Duo: What is a mom addicted to the Internet?: Just surfing the Internet all day long: Oh, is it just like Mom on Taobao? Mom... 10. Duoduo likes to learn English, so she started to call me Mommy. Every day, Mommy is longer than Mommy, so I always thought that I was acting in the Hong Kong drama Duoduo.: Mommy, how do you say mom in English for dolphin?: Er, I don’t know Ye Duoduo: How do you say mommy owl in English? Mother: Ah, that one... I know the cat is CAT, the owl... Duo Duo: I don’t know this, I don’t know that, I’m such a stupid mother, my mother said unconvinced: What about you, you know what? ? Duoduo said excitedly: I know, I know, Duoduo knows everything, ask me, ask me, what do pigs say, what do dogs say...Mom...this, uh, I know too...ask me this next time too... 11. Go to the cake shop to buy bread Duoduo: Mommy, I want that big birthday cake Mommy: No, I bought that one for my birthday, Duoduo: Then my fourth birthday is tomorrow, mom: Who said that? You were born to me and you still want to trick me Duoduo: Oh, I wish I were born by my father. 12. Duoduo in the supermarket: Mom, I want to buy that love chocolate. I saw Ferrero Rocher’s, it’s really expensive. I picked up a box of Dove’s on sale.: Buy this, Duoduo: Why, I want that caring mother to point at the English words on Ferrero Rocher and say: It says on it that children are not allowed to eat it. Once they eat it, all their teeth will fall out. Duoduo looks at her mother suspiciously, and her mother picks up Dove and calls it a deer.: DORA, did you see it? It’s your English name. This is written for the cute little Duoduo! Duoduo smiled happily, took Dove's mother and sighed.: Duoduo, you must learn English well Season 2 1. One night, Duoduo suddenly said: I really want to go out and play! Mom said: It's getting dark, where do you want to go? Duoduo thought for a while and said: Mom and Dad, let’s go to the safari park, Dad said: No, it’s so dark. What if the tiger comes out and eats Dad? Duoduo said lightly: Then find a new father! Dad vomited blood and mom fainted from laughter: What kind of new father will he be? Duoduo said: She takes us out to play every day, buys us chocolates every day, and gives us many gifts every day... Mom said longingly: It’s great that Dad continues to vomit blood... 2 Duoduo’s talk about the wheel comes again: Dad, didn't you say you would buy me a bigger balloon? You keep your word. Don't lie to children. Didn't you say... Dad said frustratedly: Well, my mother saw Duoduo coming back with a Fuwa balloon and said strangely: Why did you buy this? It’s such a waste. It will run out of gas after a while! Duoduo said immediately: Yes, it’s all my dad’s fault. I had to buy it for my dad.: Why do I have to buy it... Duoduo: Originally, I wanted to buy the roasted sweet potatoes next to the balloon, but you walked over and bought the balloon directly for my dad @￥#%&………… 3. Duoduo has been very excited to come back from school one day after knowing that she was born in the year of Rooster.: Mom, I don’t want to be a chicken anymore. Mom: Why? Duoduo: Chickens like to eat caterpillars, it’s so disgusting, mom: The zodiac sign cannot be changed.: But I don’t want to be born as a chicken anymore...I decided to be...a lucky baby...Mom: 12. There is no Fuwa Duoduo in the zodiac signs: But... But, I have already decided. 4. After school, Duoduo lay on the bed watching TV, Mom: Why are you lying down? Does your stomach hurt? Duoduo: My stomach doesn’t hurt. I’m listening to the bugs in my stomach talking. My mother asked curiously.: What do they say?: They said they wanted to eat chocolate mom: Haha, I won’t be fooled by Duoduo: When the stingy mother saw her angry face, Duoduo quickly explained—it wasn’t me, it was the bug in her belly that said it. 5. Mom tied Duoduo’s shoelaces.: Duoduo, if you don’t know how to tie these shoelaces, you can ask the teacher to help. Duoduo: Pig Beibei’s mother said alertly as she helped me tie them yesterday.: Pig Beibei? Men, Duoduo said: Yes mom: Why is he helping you tie your shoes?: He likes me. Mom was shocked.: …..Ah, this….Don’t like him, Duoduo: why mom: …..This...well, hehehe, because you are still young, Duoduo thought for a while: It doesn't matter, because Pig Beibei is also a very young mother... 6. Duoduo had several pimples on her buttocks, so her mother used a traditional method to give her a salt water bath, and then went out to surf the Internet for a long time. Duoduo was forgotten, and Duoduo was yelling in the bathroom.: Mom, Mom, do you want to turn me into a pickled radish? ? Season 3 1. Mom is washing dishes in the kitchen, and Duoduo obediently helps. Mom said with emotion: It’s true that the children of the poor are in charge early! Dad snorted and asked: Duoduo, are you a poor kid or a rich kid? Duoduo thought for a while and said: I am a mother and child! (She thought her father was asking about her children) 2. Duoduo was lying on the billiard table, and her mother asked: Stomachache? Duoduo said: It’s not what my mother said disdainfully: Is the bug in your stomach talking again? Duoduo said impatiently: It's not that she pointed to the billiard ball under her belly and said: Don't disturb me, I'm hatching eggs! 3. Duoduo persuaded her father to buy her a Fuwa balloon. Dad said: Don’t you have several balloons at home? It would be a waste to buy them once every time! Duoduo: Dad, please buy me another one. When I grow up, can I buy it for you too? dad: I don’t like balloons… Duoduo: Then I will buy you some shoes, nice shoes... Duoduo was walking contentedly holding the Fuwa doll, and then saw Duoduo, who was selling balloons.: Dad, can I buy you two pairs of shoes? 4. When eating hot pot, my mother opened the lid and the lens was suddenly covered with water vapor. She was so busy that she almost knocked over the hot pot. Duo Duo said contemptuously - Mom, please don't be so embarrassed! 5. Duoduo said: Dad, do you think it’s better for me to watch Crayon Shin-chan or Snoopy? dad: Don't even look at it, your eyes will become short-sighted.: Well, I have no choice but to run away from home! dad: Where to go Duoduo: Go outside and watch 6. Duoduo after eating 3 Ferrero Rochers: Mom, I also want to eat something, Mom: What Duoduo: It's my favorite. Mom is pretending to be confused on purpose.: It’s rice, Duoduo said angrily: not mom: It was Qingcai and Radish Duoduo who said even more angrily: Am I a little white rabbit? Mom continues to pretend to be confused.: What is it? What on earth is it? Duoduo said angrily: Mom, didn’t you say you should be happy during the New Year? Don’t you want me to be happy? Am I not your child? Isn’t there chocolate at home? My mother was completely defeated and had to say - OK, let’s eat 2 more.