Want to do a good job in safety? Then don’t talk like that

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American communication expert Marshall Rosenberg says, “I believe that people are born with a love for life and a desire to help one another. But what exactly prevents us from feeling that love within us, leading us to hurt one another?” The reason lies in the fact that many people do not know how to communicate effectively. If, as someone responsible for ensuring safety, your words lead to misunderstandings, arguments, and rifts, then it’s impossible to carry out your job properly. The following eight types of statements are annoying as soon as they’re spoken; security professionals, take a look – have you ever used them? 1. Directive type: “You should.” This condescending approach turns communication into commands, leading to resistance. Arbitrarily giving orders often disrupts others’ workflow and is offensive. II. Interrogative type: “Why not”. Sometimes we want to offer suggestions, but it comes across as an interrogation and accusation. You might as well use phrasing like “What do you think if we did that?”; such a consultative tone is more acceptable. III. Labeling style: “Why do you always do this?” Everyone makes mistakes from time to time; don’t judge someone harshly, otherwise they will feel wronged or even angry. IV. The impatient type: “Don’t tell me.” We think we know everything, and therefore refuse to listen to others’ “excuses”. Such a dismissive attitude makes the other person feel as if they have no one to turn to, leading to feelings of resentment. V. Threatening style: “If... then I will...”. Threats often provoke a rebellious attitude; it is better to use rewards, that is, to promise what kind of reward will be given if the other party does something, as this is usually more acceptable. VI. The pattern of praise first followed by criticism: “It’s okay, but…” This affirmation is merely superficial; it’s what comes after “however” that’s the important part. This sentence structure makes it seem like we are not sincere, or even a bit dismissive. It can be changed to “It’s already very good; a little more improvement would make it perfect.” VII. The humor-type: “Who knows?” Such ambiguous statements indicate perfunctoriness, and everyone wants their voice to be taken seriously. It can be changed to “I don’t quite agree with you; you should ask others for their opinions.” VIII. Comparative type: “Look at those others.” We always think that comparison can inspire people to strive harder after realizing their shortcomings, but what we don’t realize is that using this approach too often has the opposite effect; it can lead to giving up on oneself, and it also makes us seem too critical, thereby affecting relationships. To address the above issues, it is useful to keep in mind the following communication skills: 1. Point out how others’ behavior affects safe production, without making any judgments or accusations. 2. Express one’s own feelings and emotions, without guessing others’ intentions. 3. While expressing your own demands, ensure that the other person feels respected, trusted, and understood. 4. Make specific and clear safety requests (state what is desired, rather than what is not desired), and they should truly be requests rather than commands.