Meeting pain at the corner

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Introduction: What the hell is pain? It often pops up when we are enjoying the goodness of life, so unwilling to be alone. Some say love is found around the corner, but sometimes we’re caught off guard and end up encountering pain. It seems that pain is a mischievous trickster, preferring to play the game of ‘encounter’ with us more than love does. 　　 　　Encountering Pain at the Corner 　　　 By Peng Jing (Counselor) 　　　 Edited by Feng Qi 　　　 What on earth is pain? It often pops up when we are enjoying the goodness of life, so unwilling to be alone. Some say love is found around the corner, but sometimes we’re caught off guard and end up encountering pain. It seems that pain is a mischievous trickster, preferring to play the game of ‘encounter’ with us more than love does. 　　 　　Many people turn pale at the mention of pain; they try to avoid it at all costs. Such reactions stem from the fact that being afflicted by pain is indeed no pleasant experience. When pain strikes, we are eager to get rid of it, and this eagerness is often driven by helplessness and fear of pain itself. At such times, pain becomes a powerful and terrifying enemy, and one either gives in to it and is overwhelmed by pain, an outcome that is undoubtedly sad ； Either muster the courage to engage in a \"brutal fight\" and defeat pain! But then the question arises: can pain really be defeated? Is there no more pain after being defeated? Think about what your answer would be. 　　 　　The one who creates pain is oneself. First, see where pain comes from. I believe life begins with profound despair, and suffering begins with the desire for pleasure. At the mental level, we have many desires, that is, needs. When these needs are not satisfied, pain arises, and this stems from our attachment to the self within us – our attachment to those needs and to fulfilling them. It is we ourselves who create suffering; this powerful and terrifying enemy behind all this is actually ourselves. This battle was a blatant civil war – fighting against one’s own people, which is painful; whichever side loses will suffer. Having written this, I can’t help but complain – to use a popular phrase these days: \"No zuo, no die\"; why try? It’s simply because the world is a place full of contradictions, and humans are no exception. Just like the sun, it can bring light and warmth to people, but it can also cause burning sensations. Even though it has its positive aspects of providing light and warmth, it still prompts thousands of people every day to curse at it; in fact, even when the sun is scorching, people look for the shadows cast by its light on various objects in order to enjoy the coolness. It is just a sun, but we humans assign it different roles based on our various needs, which in turn bring us different feelings; this is the purpose of the sun’s existence. 　　 　　The meaning of pain’s existence is that we need it. 　　　　　So, what is the meaning of pain’s existence? 　　 　　To put it simply, it’s because we need it. 　　 　　Our lives are sometimes shitty and imperfect; pain is part of life. What’s particularly interesting is that many topics of conversation between people revolve around “how much I’m in pain.” 　　 　　I once overheard a conversation between two people: Person A said, \"I have to be at the office by 9 o’clock every day; it’s really frustrating.\" 　　 　　B said, \"I start work at 9:30, but since my home is far away, I have to get up at 7, and that’s really troublesome.\" 　　 　　A said, I have to get up at 6 o’clock; I need to take my child to school in the morning. 　　 　　B said, \"I often work overtime at night and always stay up until midnight before going to bed.\" 　　 　　A said: Some time ago, when working on a project, we stayed up all night for several consecutive days. 　　 　　…… 　　 　　And that’s when, after hearing that, I couldn’t help but laugh – was this a competition to see who had it worse? Obviously, they had indeed been discussing who was suffering the most, and in the end they both sighed and said, “It’s not easy for anyone.” ”In such comparisons, it seems that one can find a kind of resonance and comfort in the other. 　　 　　When I’m with my close friends, more than half of the time they spend complaining about their troubles. To outsiders, expressing pain is considered something shameful by many people. Yet it is precisely because of these fixed ideas that I am able to better sense the trust that others place in me when they share their feelings with me. The prerequisite for this trust is that I adopt an accepting attitude and give them sufficient attention; often, they in turn respond to me in the same way, which brings us closer together. Pain gives us more motivation to actively seek love, as well as connection and support from others; it makes us feel that we are no longer islands, and such a world becomes more real and reliable. 　　 　　We muster all our strength to show ourselves and the world that I am capable of bearing pain; pain itself has a purpose as a source of support. Just as in desperate situations, in order to survive we must strive to unleash our creativity and courage to face those situations and get out of them. I believe this is a force that transcends life, and it is precisely this that shows us the need to demonstrate the value of our existence in such a way. 　　 　　Savoring pain A friend said, “I’ve been going through a lot of pain lately. I plan to savor the feeling of pain carefully; it’s painful, but suffering a little is good for you.” ”It sounds like a joke, but when you consider those words, it’s not hard to sense his acceptance and composure in the face of pain. 　　 　　Although experiencing pain is itself a painful thing, when we approach it with reverence and curiosity, it gives us more opportunities to reflect, to explore its patterns – how it arises, develops, and fades away. Thus, when you encounter pain one day, that encounter will no longer be a source of shock; rather, it will become an opportunity for growth. While pain creates darkness, it allows us to see who we really are and to engage in more meaningful dialogue with ourselves. 　　 　　At this moment, I think of *Murong’s poem: “I am like a goldsmith, hammering and working day and night, merely to turn pain into gold jewelry as thin as a cicada’s wing.” Jewelry adorns us, offering us more space and possibilities… In this light, Pain Lord seems quite decent – a model of ugliness with a rich inner essence.